Ain't Ready to Make Nice

18 June 2007

11:03 AM

a wonderful guy just came into my life now.. it’s as if GOD heard my little sobs at night because I was hurting from the break up with J1 and GOD couldn’t sleep… then came along J2 who’s calling me sweetie like J1…J2 asked me couple of days ago if he stands a chance to be my bf… and I just couldn’t give him a straight answer… i really don't know... now i'm in davao for the weekend, and J2 flew in to see me.. how can you not love a guy like that… I must say, J2 has been very very consistent in the whole 2 weeks of courtship…

now let’s do a bit of profiling for J2:

1. he’s 39 years old (my fetish..hehehe) -- BIG CHECK

2. he’s financially stable, secured, and could definitely pay for my luxury which is to travel abroad.. we talked about this, and he plans to bring me to bangkok and batanes for starters) --BIG BIG CHECK

3. he’s sweet (would spend for mobile calls every hour to call me...makes sure that I’m still breathing and that my heart is not abducted by an extra-terrestrial he calls the embassy guy (he’s another guy who’d drive 170km/hr just to get freaky with me, well…it’s another story!) -BIG CHECK

4. Philanthropist (what would you call a guy who showered me with chocolates, a chili glass accessory, and a PUG during our very first date? The date was all expense paid, tax included! ---BIG BIG CHECK

5. single (absolutely single… not hitched… been a bachelor for three years) --BIG BIG CHECK

6. intelligent (he’d talked to me for hours and hours about anything from the lineage of the making of a national artist to determining the trajectory points of an X627*Hft variable, and the only word I say is ‘yeah’ apart from 'really?' it is not because i'm dumb or playing it.. but too much of the talkies seems like murmurs or buzzes, that you don't understand a thing... oooopppsss sorry J2)-- small check

7. a certified CAPRICORN! ---big problem, I’m a Leo and.... Leo + Capricorn = BEASTFIGHT... I should know.. believe me.. R (my ex years ago) was a capricorn and i almost ended chemically imbalanced!

And so help me GOD.

What’s my problem? He definitely is a prized catch for a serious relationship. Honesty can be such a cruel word really. I don’t think I’m ready to get into a relationship. And my dilemma now is, how to tell him that. The longer I delay the bad news, the greater his expenses to woo me! He’s getting into a bad investment in me… If he reads this, I’ll HAVE to tell him what i truly when we go out for dinner tonight…. be right back...